Dear Renae, – Part Two

Change-Your-LifeWhile I was on vacation nearly two weeks ago, I received another email from a fan who picked up the Law of Attraction magazine and read my article “Happy From the Inside Out” in the Spring 2013 issue; She wanted to know how she can start helping others. This was the very first email I’ve received as a result of the magazine article. WOW!! What a DELIGHTFUL feeling!! Below is her original message…

I truly believe certain circumstances happen for a reason. These past few months have been rough for me. I moved to Cali all by myself from the Midwest because its where I felt I was meant to be. It’s been lots of ups and downs since I’ve been here to say the least. Just like you I have been through a lot in my life and I wouldn’t change anything that has made me who I am today. I also came across the book the secret which started me on my path to better myself. After I read it the first time everything was good for about a year and then I kind of got off the path as well.

That’s where you come in. Standing in the airport ready to board a plane I felt I needed to get the Law of attraction magazine which is where I read your article. I am at the point in my life where I am ready for it to begin. I am trying sooo hard to change bad negative though patters. I am in the beauty industry and have been for many years and I feel like they have all had the same problems which make me come to the conclusion that I am not using my abilities properly.

I truly believe I am on this earth to help others. I want to use my degree to help others and I am not sure where to start. I want to make a difference sooo bad. I was wondering if you had any ideas on where to start. I am soo ready for love, health, and my life purpose to begin. I know you have been here so I was just hoping you had some advice. I know I have never met you and I am not sure if you will even ever read this letter. But, either way I wanted to say thank you. Hopefully I will hear from you!

Life-is-beautifulAgain, I thought maybe I should share these tid bits with the rest of our Candy Coated Reality community, so here is part of my response (which is a copy/paste from what I typed into my iPhone notepad while on my flight to Cancun!! And, I trimmed this down for length and to use some content in other upcoming blogs):

Wow!! Let me begin by saying THANK YOU!! I’m honored and humbled by your email. You’re actually the first person to contact me as a result of the LOA magazine article. THANK YOU for this delightful first experience!!! Yah Rah!!!

As an intensively spiritual woman, I’ve always believed that when an idea pops into my head it is actually my angels guiding me because either I need it or the other person(s) involved needs it. I think with your email it was definitely because we BOTH needed it. Thank you again!!

God works in mysterious ways… as long as we trust in His plan!! Not always easy, I know!! Besides, I’ve always had difficulty with the whole idea of trusting in God’s timing – ha! I’m still working on that one… for sure. Maybe I will always work on it, but in the meantime I just keep reminding myself!!

Start TODAYOkay, so onto your specific inquiry… As you can see by the length of this email… I guess I have a lot of food for thought to share!! Below is a long list of lessons I’ve acquired so far during my lifetime. I’m confident somewhere in there are nuggets of wisdom for you to pull out which pertain to your situation and may assist you in mastering your thoughts; therefore, shifting your thoughts from negative to positive. Once. And. For. All.

As you read this, it may sound preachy because it is simply a list, but please know preachy is not my intent. Generally, I try to write my blogs and articles in a narrative, story-telling “this is how I did it” format, but for this response, please forgive my list. Also, please understand I’m still learning… and I’m no pro… I’m a Sociologist and simply a student of the world… I’ve learned to share my experiences with others in order to solidify the lessons learned in my own life while doing so also provides me a gentle reminder as well.

NEW DAYThe lessons have indeed helped me along my positive path. Remember, life is a series of choices; therefore, life is exactly what you make it. Carve out a life for yourself that will make your heart jump and sing with pure and utter joy every single day your heart beats!!!!!

When it comes to your life’s purpose… live your life for YOU. Not for your mother. Not for your father. Not for your friends. Their expectations DO NOT MATTER. Sure, they may have your best interests at heart, but the only opinion that truly matters is your own. If they love you, unconditionally, then they will love you for YOU… no matter your choices in life… instead of only loving you for the image of you they’ve conjured up or expect.

a001_to_laugh_often_and_much_frameable_print_1-r3e6746d47c374de8a2c7641fb23fe381_azpy_400Be who YOU want to be and do what makes YOU happy!!! This is your life… not theirs!!! And, we all evolve and change over time. What you find to be your life purpose today… may not be your passion tomorrow and that is okay. Actually, that is healthy growth.

As I set out to create Candy Coated Reality nearly three years ago, my life coach suggested I attempt to reach ONE other person at a time. Huh? BUT I want to reach billions!!! He made a good point… sure I want to reach the entire world’s population (and be the next great “inspirational thought leader” LOL!!)… because like you I know in the depths of my soul it is my divine intention to do so, but I must be sensible!

My life coach warned me taking on a million or billion people would be overwhelming and self defeating. Yeah. You think? Smart man!! So, my advice to you is the same: aim to reach and assist ONE other person each day. For a while that one other person may even be YOURSELF. Find your optimism again. As you assist one person at a time, you will discover your efforts will multiply without even trying to focus on it… Soon you WILL BE assisting millions and billions too. Don’t give up!! It is always the darkest before the dawn. Too many people give up, out of frustration, just before their miracle happens!!!!

Purpose: How?
As for how… Do some soul searching to determine which avenue best suits you. Everyone is different. For me, the avenue is writing and speaking engagements. For you, it could be something different entirely. Meditate on it. Pray about it. Allow ideas and thoughts to flow freely. It WILL come to you. No need to seek out ideas on the “how” from others because this should come from you and only you… directly from the depths of your soul… if it is to have any value at all in this world!!

Regularly ExtraordinaryThe more you learn, the more you experience, then you will morph your goals into exactly what you want… fine tuning and recalibrating along the way. Remember, it is your purpose and passion. Have you ever heard the fable about a man who builds a house based on everyone’s opinions and advice? Well in listening to everyone else instead of following his own intuition, he either never finishes or ends up building a crooked house because all of the advice was inevitably conflicting and incongruent with each other!!

Purpose: Who?
Determine your intended audience. My audience happens to be primarily women of all ages and children (yet more specifically Tweens, Teens, and Young Adults). Sure, I have men who follow my writing and I’m incredibly thankful and blessed by anyone who reads my work or attends a seminar; however, I feel my work resonates deeply with women. By helping others you will inadvertently help yourself by default too. Promise.

In your journey, surround yourself with those who champion your cause!! These people may support you in a multitude of ways (mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially, and more!!). As you progress be sure to tell EVERYONE about your desired outcome… yes even strangers. You have no idea who may need you, who may be interested in your help, and likewise who may be able to assist you in meeting your goals!! And on the flip side, release those who do not support you, are toxic, and negative!! Don’t allow a critic to rob you of your dreams!!

Purpose: Where?
Okay, once you’ve determine the how and who then it is time to determine the where. Will you meet people in person? If yes, will it be one-on-one, in small groups, or large groups?? Or will you communicate with people via phone or email? Or will you have an online presence? Will you have a website, blog, or Facebook fan page? Or maybe all of the above? Determine your delivery method(s) for the help you wish to bestow upon others.

No LIMITSOnce your plan is devised, then break it up into measurable chunks. Don’t try to do it all at once like “Presto Chango!!” Ha. We both know that is impossible and you will make yourself very unhappy in the process, so set reasonable goals, put them in priority order, and then start checking items off one at a time. Keep in mind, you may only know one item right now to put on your list and that it okay. Your list will grow, shift, and evolve over time. No worries!!

Purpose: When?
NOW!! Don’t delay. Live your bliss. It is true what they say… when you follow your bliss and let your passion be your guide, you will never work a day in your life!!! It may seem scary, but just START!! Do something that works toward your goals. You will change course multiple times, find some things that don’t work, but never-the-less keep on keeping on until you reach your finish line!!

beautiful mind and lifePlease do not waste a minute in worry or fear. We all must fail. Failures are where and how we learn. Messing up and taking wrong turns are good things!! Heck, the most fun I’ve ever had are the times I’ve been traveling and I got lost!! Many adventures may be found while we take detours and journey off the “intended” path. In the end, never confuse a failure with a final defeat. Chalk up whatever obstacles stand in your way to invaluable life experiences. Learn and keep it moving!!!

It is all up to you…
Give some of these ideas a shot. It may not all work for you or interest you for that matter. Change will not come overnight… but in time it will happen gradually. Gosh, you won’t even notice the change until much time has passed and you wonder when everything became so dramatically better.

No matter what curveballs life throws at you, grow where you are planted. Okay, I know I sound like a fortune cookie, but it is true. “Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” – Theodore Roosevelt. In the end, I write all of this because I want you to be happy; blissfully happy… Living the life you’ve imagined… Cultivating your passion!!!

LoveWHATyouDOI’m on a flight to Cancun right now for a much needed vacation get away and as music (my great motivator) blares in my ear I’m typing my email to you. Why?! Cause I love it… this is my passion… my bliss… my life’s work!!! Now, if I had to balance a spreadsheet or do ANYTHING remotely math related I’d be miserable!! That would be WORK for me. Well, honestly it would be tortuous. Ha!! But I have a friend who adores math. Numbers to her are the equivalent to words and letters to me!!

The captain just announced we are making our final approach. OMG, I’ve been typing for an hour (my first stop is Atlanta), yet it feels like it has been three minutes. Wow, see how lost we can get in our passions. Thanks for helping me pass the time on my flight!!!

PS, the guy seated to my left just asked me if I was a writer because my fingers have been moving feverishly over my iPhone notepad the entire flight… so of course I told him about my article, my life’s work, and a book I’m in the middle of crafting. It was fantastic to hear his encouragement and accolades!! The last thing he said to me was, “Good luck with your book!! That will be so cool!!” See, motivation can even be gifted to us by complete strangers.

Dream BIGPSS, Now go be happy, positive, and optimistic while tackling your dream… one step at a time. I know, in my heart, you’ve got the power within you to make your dreams come true and shape your life into whatever your heart and soul desires!!!

And again, THANK YOU for reaching out. Hope some of these tips help!!

Please keep me posted on your journey. God Bless!! xoxo

© Renae Rossman and Candy Coated Reality™

12 thoughts on “Dear Renae, – Part Two

  1. A great post. Lots to think about – really think about! For me it is not so hard to define purpose and what I want the hard part is staying true to that – in a thousand ways I am pulled off course by my own thinking. I have recently started meditation and mindfulness, working to chose my thoughts and it seems to be pulling me more on course.

    Thank you for the great blog and for sharing!


    • Wyn, I think “staying true to our purpose” is a struggle we all face!!! I’m so thankful for your comment… yes, I too find meditation and mindfulness are helpful 😉 Keep at it and you will stay true to your purpose more and more!! xo

  2. I love your web-site! I read a book, years ago, called Learned Optimism. Being optimistic still doesn’t come easily to me, either but bits of encouraging wisdom really help to keep me on track. Thanks for all your bright quotes and insightful thoughts.

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