Originally posted on “And Baby Makes Two” (featured on a parenting magazine website) – October 20, 2013
The relationship between a patient and physician is a very important one. Over the decades, I’ve been very fortunate to find the most phenomenal doctors… from my family physician to my endocrinologist to my gynecologist to my surgeon… until now. My Endocrinologist referred me to a fertility doctor who also specializes in endocrinology because it is imperative to monitor my prolactinoma (pituitary tumor) while pregnant. Let’s call this recommended baby specialist Dr. Y (because I’m unsure WHY I wasted my time with him).
From the minute I walked through the door I should have known this was not the right doctor’s office for me. My first appointment took two and a half hours… because I was left waiting. Then I was finally ushered into a room to talk to an intern and resident. Toward the end of the two hours, Dr. Y walked in to say hello.
He looked over my paperwork and asked, “So why now?” Ummmm, I turn 40 next month and this is the best birthday present I could give myself, right? Besides, I should’ve given birth five to seven years ago. “Yes, but why not wait?” What? Wait for what? Wait for who? Mr. Right? I’ve been dating since I was 15 years old and I can tell you Mr. Perfect does not exist. Dr. Y didn’t look pleased.
Later, Dr. Y performed an ultrasound and was less than friendly. He warned, “You do know at your age and with fertility meds, you’re not only likely to have multiples… it is quite probable.”
Okay. I would be thrilled with twins!! “Well, maybe I shouldn’t tell you this on your first visit, but the woman you just walked past in the hallway is pregnant with triplets AND she is doing it alone!!!” Well, I’m ready for whatever number of children I’m given. I’m very blessed with an arsenal of family and friend support.
Is that how a fertility visit was supposed to go? I walked away confused. It seemed my appointment was a bust. I was so shocked this doctor discouraged me. But, I was willing to give him another try.
There were loads of pre-baby tests Dr. Y ordered. It was a busy couple of weeks of ultrasounds, sonograms, blood work and pap smears. Luckily, I passed every test with flying colors and my ovarian cyst disappeared.
My second visit with Dr. Y was to hear my fertility test results. Each time he would tell me a result, it was like pulling teeth to get an explanation and more detail of what it all meant. Then he dropped a bomb, “Well, you have a 10-15% chance of getting pregnant and 1-2% chance of having a chromosomally abnormal baby.”
Why was Dr. Y being so negative? Why not say, “You have a 98-99% chance of having a healthy baby.” I really wasn’t feeling comfortable. Then he continued, “So do you want to wait?” Doc, why in the world would I wait? You just delivered the grimmest statistics because of my age. YES I want to start ASAP. He did not look pleased.
I left his office frustrated and defeated…
Having a baby should be the happiest time in your life, right? I don’t care what science says. It doesn’t matter to me what the odds are because I have faith I will be a mommy. I know I’m more than any percentage or test result. My faith is indeed stronger than any statistic. My best guess is Dr. Y didn’t approve of a single woman bringing a child into this world alone. It wasn’t long and I decided to cut my losses and run… to find a new baby doctor.
My new fertility specialist is AMAZING!!! We will call him Dr. X because X marks the spot. Yes, I love him. In just over an hour, he walked me through each and every step, answered all of my questions, advised me to go on a low glycemic diet, recommended certain vitamins, handed me a prescription for my fertility drug (femera) and the ovulation shot (ovidrel), told me to visit a discount drug mart to fill the scripts to save money, and walked me through step-by-step how he planned to monitor my tumor while pregnant.
Now, I’m uber excited and ready to get this baby making party started! My fertility meds are in hand and thanks to Dr. X’s pharmacy suggestion my prescription was $4. WHAT? Yes, four dollars!!! This man eased my concerns while providing me the expertise and support that I expect in a physician. I’m now calm, cool, and collected. With my next cycle we will start the fertility meds.
Here’s to hoping everything falls into place now that I’ve found the perfect baby specialist for me!!
© Renae Rossman and Candy Coated Reality™