Do you believe in love at first sight? Or is it simply a thing of fairy tales and urban legends? Love. Sure. I’ve fallen in love many times. But instantly? Rubbish. Complete garbage, right?
At least I thought so until it happened to me. My own personal fairy tale; the night we met was magical. Simply wondrous: PURE wonder, chemistry, joy, admiration, beauty, intellect, attraction, compassion, respectfulness, laughter, affection and unadulterated bliss. My world was turned topsy turvy!!! Yep, smitten didn’t even begin to cover it.
Never had I ever felt soooooo connected to a man before in my life!!! W-O-W, so instant. It was as if we had known each other our entire lives. The experience was amazing. Truly. In my wildest dreams, I never believed in love at first sight… ever… until I met him. Then I thought it was possible. Now, I’m not saying he was perfect, but he was perfect for me.
No man had ever made me feel so good about myself. Time spent together brought me so much joy… making me hold my breath… while simultaneously wishing for endless togetherness. In his arms, I felt so protected as if I could’ve simply disappeared into pure and utter bliss.
Then life happened. Two months later. Poof. Gone. Perhaps, love isn’t enough when life gets in the way. Sigh. I’ve always wondered if “love” is enough. I now have my answer. At least in this love experience anyway. Now I wonder… is there such a thing as love at first sight, TWICE?
Love at first sight: fact or myth? Guess it is up to individual interpretation. As for me? Fact. Even though we didn’t ride off into the sunset to live “Happily Ever After” I’m still a believer.
Two years ago, today, was the happiest day of my life (so far). First date. Butterflies. Happiness. Bliss. Love at first sight, but life had other plans. I miss that day. I miss that love. And yet I smile because I know one day I will be even happier!!
© Renae Rossman and Candy Coated Reality™
They say “Love at first site,” not “Love forever and ever and ever at first sight.”
Falling out of love doesn’t mean that love didn’t exist. I totally believe in it!
Agreed… falling out of love doesn’t mean that love didn’t exist!! Couldn’t agree more!! Thank you 🙂
I’m a happily married woman. No man ever made me as happy as my husband, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t enjoy the little spurts of “love/infatutation” or whatever it was along the way. Life is to be cherished, no matter what stage you’re at. And as Cher once said, “Until I meet the right one, I’m having fun with the wrong ones!” Better words were never spoken! ENJOY! 🙂
Thanks, seakist!! Great advice 🙂
I’ve always been told we have to kiss a few frogs before our prince comes along, LOL!! So happy you’re happy!! xo!
Beautiful post, I hope you do find that love. The only ‘love at first sight’ experience that has lasted for me was the day my son was born, everything else has been a rainbow, beautiful but an optical illusion, 🙂
Oh, Ria **GASP** I can’t wait until that “love at first sight” feeling with my children one day!! Thanks for reading!! xo
God bless you- as u find that first love- Opal
Thanks, Opal 🙂 Blessings to you!!
I definitely believe in love at first sight.
But love isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon. I’m not saying you didn’t try your best, but as you pointed out, sometimes life just gets in the way. To me, that says it’s not meant to be. But that topsy turvy head over heels instantaneous connection…well I’ve been waiting for another one of those for years. They don’t happen often.
So true, kwgsmith!! Love certainly is not a sprint!! One day we will all find our perfect marathon 🙂
Reblogged this on StanfordGirl and commented:
Fact Or Myth?
-Love At First Sight.
Oh, WOW… thank you StanfordGirl for reblogging this post!! I’m happy you believe too 😉
Totally believe 🙂
I fall in love at first sight all the time! Funnily enough, when it’s shown back to me I stop falling in love with anyone else and instantly become monogamous. But for me, when I see the character of someone in their eyes and when my feelings are being reciprocated I just can’t help myself. I’ve had to learn to switch this part of me off so I can remain objective in case I get a bad rep for being a player or something.
James, all the time? Really? So cool. It has only happened to me once and it was such a rush… such an exilaration… that I can’t wait to experience it again. If I’m lucky enough to experience it again. For me… it was almost like walking through the forest and stumbling upon a unicorn… beautiful, magical and proof it is real 🙂 And, I’ve heard you can see someone’s soul through their eyes!!
i fell in love with a man 3 years ago, only i didn’t realize it at the time! i was with a different guy and my Love was singing onstage. now, 3 years later, this singer and i are totally in love and when we had our first meeting for coffee, we talked for hours and hours.
i do think there’s puppy love, and that is a real love, except that it feels like forever love until it grows up and runs away. anyway, this singer and i, i guess we are still in puppy love, it’s been 3 months. we have decided to make our future together a reality, and to believe and make it happen. we are both middle aged, and we’ve had an awful lot of relationships! so maybe True Love is when both of you decide to make it stick.
“True love is when both of you decide to make it stick.” Oh, I love that Mary!! Thank you 🙂 Isn’t it funny how love can totally sneak up on you?? How lovely 🙂
Being a little shall we ‘older’ …ok I’m below the 60 mark…just. I have had my fair share of romances.
There have been people that I truly fell in love with 1st sight…only to find it was a ‘fell in lust with’..that’s the difference! 🙂
Physical attraction makes you feel that it is love at first sight…but those relationships usually are never solid enough to last.
I was married for 19 years and then divorced. I had relationships after that and even was engaged to a man 16 years my junior (shame on me I know). Suffice to say we ended and I met my partner of 4.5 years Mr. S. We became friends first and the love followed, we haven’t fought or had a cross word between the 2 of us since we met. Guess being older we are over that type of relationship or sweating the small stuff. I think friends is a perfect beginning… the romance the skipping heart beats…the we are who we are…has made it last. 🙂
I’m so happy to hear you’ve found your perfect love!! Yes, I’ve experienced lust at first sight too. LOL!! Well, with this particular love… he was not someone I would normally be attracted to (and I actually told him so, but he laughed and later once I shared my feelings he said, “Not bad for a guy who isn’t your type, huh?”). I think it may have been lust at first sight for him. Ha! But for me, I connected with his soul. Instantly. I felt as if our souls were connected over lifetimes… if that is even possible? I dunno. I still love him. I always will. I send him love & light whenever he crosses my mind 🙂
Sometimes people make a soul connection on first meeting and that is the real deal; otherwise ‘love’ at first sight is usually no more than a physical attraction that eventually wears itself out. By the way, thanks for the ‘follow’…did you check out today’s post on the Fire Initiation: the Love Bug?
WOW, Bev… I loved your post!! I’m a Leo and certainly in a Fire Initiation!! Powerful stuff 🙂 Thank you!!!
Thanks! Glad you like it.
First of all, I love reading your blog. I do believe in Love at First sight and I can count on one hand the times it has happened to me. A hopless romantic, dreamer, who lives in a fantasy world or as I’m told, it’s really an amazing feeling when you can look into someone’s eyes and you get that feeling. The feeling is mind numbing, yes, it could be lust but there’s more to that look and the people who experience this know. It’s not about just sex it’s more the journey and the discovery along the way! I hope you keep falling in Love and you’ll know when it’s the right frog!
Thanks, Pat 🙂 I certainly hope MY frog is right around the corner. Ha!!
My mom told me, that just before my father passed away, he told her that if there is a next life, he wish her to be her wife again. My mom told me, you know son, we fixed things along the way in our marriage, and never give up each other. Love at first sight? There is a long way to go in the journey of life. My mom passed away 1 Nov 2012 at 76, almost three years after my father has gone. I think, the most touching story is when we look back at our journey of life just before we die, we say to ourselves we had a true love of a life time (not 2 years, 10 years, or 30 years, but really a life (of boring?) time)
**GASP** your father was quite the romantic. What a lovely thing to say to his wife!! **sniff, sniff** I’m sorry to hear of the loss of both of your parents!!! I certainly hope happy memories like this one comfort you 🙂 And, touching… INDEED!! xo
Yes, there are so many good memories with them, sometime I smile, sometime I cry, it does not matter how long they have gone, in my memory they are my adorable parents.
At the end of the days, only when we care, and not giving up each other that makes life, wonderful.
Reblogged this on Ze Blog of Reblogs and commented:
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That strong love at first sight connection I do believe in, but I think sometimes we aren’t necessarily supposed to be with those people romantically. Non-romantic soul mates. If you run into one of those love at first sights again, I’m pretty sure the energy will be there. Thanks for dropping by my dream blog! I have another blog that I’m going to be writing something about my idea of soul mates soon. Check it out if you like http://ownyourpassion.wordpress.com
Thanks!! I’m following because I wanna read what you have to share about soulmates… for sure!!
I don’t buy it for a minute, sweet thing. Love at first sight denudes the real tree of love of all it’s fruit, leaves and glory. I met my husband when he was a pot-smoking, drug-dealing thug who could make me laugh with his cynical humor. Four years later I walked down the aisle with the man, to a life of adventure, business-building, childrearing (four, including one adopted from China). When he was diagnosed with terminal cancer, this robust, hilarious, 185 pound man with a biting wit withered to a confused, needy, dependent child that I could pick up through my tears.
He was the best. He was by turns obnoxious, ferociously protective, loving through the worst and best of times. All of this is what it means to be ‘invested’ in a relationship, and that simply doesn’t happen ‘at first sight’. I miss him terribly, and doubt I’ll ever get another. But hey, one can always hope.
Oh, Victoria I’m so sorry to hear of the loss of your husband… the love of your life… how painful… how heartbreaking!! Yes, if possible for you, do indeed keep hope alive that you will get another great love 😉 Thank you for sharing your story!!!
Hello Renae, you’ve sure picked a good topic here. There’s a few grey areas on this whole “love thing”. Firstly “love” is an inadequate word. In the C.S. Lewis book “The Four Loves” the author unwraps the whole notion of love, and what it really means. If we take love for “Eros” for example, then maybe ‘love” at first sight is a possibility. It’s ages since I read the book, so I’m a bit rusty, but I carry with me one phrase which I heard on a Marriage Encounter weekend – “Love is a decision”. True love is seeking the best for another, and serving that individual regardless. I’m over 30 years into our marriage, and only now beginning to realise I’ve not been investing in my wife like I should. If I sweep up the leaves from our lawn it isn’t because I want to have tidy garden, it’s because I want to make my wife happy – feel wanted. Goodness knows Roz is much better at showing her love by her actions. So love is a decision, and an ongoing action (series of actions). Phew, I think i wrote too much.
Stephen, “Love is a decision”. True love is seeking the best for another, and serving that individual regardless.” – Oh, how I love this tid bit of wisdom!!! Thank you!! Congrats on over 30 years of marriage!! PS, you didn’t write too much 😉 xo!!
The first time I met the woman of my life I felled in love with her but that love started as friendship-that’s right, we became friends and today we are the best of friends and we’ve been married 39 years. The love grew as we journeyed through life and three children, 11 grandchildren later we are still lovers. The love grew out of our friendship and I have to admit she is the best thing that has ever happen to me-my best friend, my lover, mother of my children, grandmother of my grandchildren, my wife.
Thank you!! I love to hear when love grows out of friendship!! Congrats on 39 years and counting!!
My first and only love thus far…We planned to have everything together and he was mine for the best and the worst 2 years of my life. But he was too young and too scared and he left me a few weeks ago without any real reason or cause. Broke my heart. I try to be happy for what we had even though it ended…but I miss him. What we had was beautiful and so pure and romantic and he was everything to me, including my best friend. I truly wanted to give him everything despite all our ups and downs and we had a lot! But it kept the passion going. I’m only 18 and although I know I’ll move on and love again, I know I’ll never get that same kind of love back with anyone else…so raw, so alive, so passionate. I’ve always believed true love never ends and that used to comfort me…now it’s terrifying. I don’t want to love someone forever who gave me and everything we had up. Love is supposed to be for always and that’s what he promised me. But despite that we’re over I know that love was so real and so deep…And I’ll never experience another like it. I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to let it go completely.
As for love at first sight…no way. Lust, maybe. But something as complex and meaningful and deep as love could never be built in a matter of minutes. It takes time, affection and often hard experiences to bring two people to really love each other. It’s something that continues to grow and change until the end and as long as you’re in love, nothing could keep you apart. I miss the warmth of it, its comfort and its caring compassion. But I don’t dare think I’ll ever get that again so quickly. I never imagined I’d fall in love with the guy I spoke of…in fact, I remember standing behind him the first time I met him and saying to my friend, “I’d never date a guy like that.” A year later, I didn’t know how I’d live without him. Now I’m trying to figure it out.
Oh, I’m so sorry to hear of your broken heart!! Take your time, heal… and soon your smile will return!! Thank you for sharing your story!! Keep your chin up, Sweetheart 😉 xo!!
It does suck when someone like that let’s you down… it makes you not want to risk going through that again… it makes you really question is it worth it and is love even real… but you’ll find it again and it will be better the next time… the great husband i’m talking about in my comment below is actually my 2nd husband… my first one was so cute and wonderful and great and then out of no where he decided he just didn’t like being married… and so i gave him what he wanted and let him go and i was like no way am i doing this again… no way am i going through all that crap… which was probably why i didn’t like a certain guy i got stuck working with because i wasn’t about to admit i found him interesting and so i was a complete butt and he responded by giving me hell… but sometimes even as hard as you try to fight something it’s inevitable… and it all caved in and like 3 weeks after my marriage ended i was in another relationship and everyone told me that was terrible and i’m just rebounding and hell i wasn’t even sure what i was doing but i knew there was something going on and i was gonna find out what… year and half later i’m dumb enough to take my vows again and it’s only been 2 years after that but i’ve never been so happy in my entire life… i thought my first love was great… and i thought the 2nd was better… and i was stupid enough to rush into my first marriage… and even dumber to rush into my 2nd but i’ll never regret any of it because it led me to where i am now… crazy happy and so in love it feels like my hearts going to explode sometimes and slowly driving my hubby crazy… and he’s perfect… and there is someone out there for you… and he’ll give you crap cause guys are stupid… and you’ll probably irritate him because women are stupid too… good thing our hearts know better… you’re young and life is full of possibilities… don’t be shutting any of them out just yet…
Thanks for sharing your story. It helps 🙂 If you could move on from a marriage and fall in love again, I’m sure I can move on from my high school sweetheart. I’m in a relationship with someone else now and even though I still feel that ache for the love I had with my ex sometimes, I’m still moving forward. Everyone is telling me the new guy is just a rebound and that I shouldn’t be doing that…and I feel the same way you did. I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m just doing it.
Love at first sight – I fear not. Sometimes it starts the other way though – you notice each other disagreeably, and then, for some reason friction turns to attraction. Only sometimes though – sometimes disagreeable encounters are a warning. KD’s comment above is also right, I think. Love and attraction are not the same sorts of things…then again, I guess, if it has happened to you, well, that is real enough, so I might end by contradicting myself and admitting the possibility…
“I might end by contradicting myself and admitting the possibility” – Ha, I love it!! Thank you 😉
when me and my husband first met we pretty much hated each other… in fact he did everything he could to irritate me and get in my way at work and i did everything i could to undermine his authority… and then one day i was sad and his sweet teddy bear side he tries to hide came out and after that we became friends but i knew almost right off the bat that he was something special… i don’t believe in love at first sight but i do believe in soul mates… my husband is my perfect match and my life would be empty without him… and i believe that there are people out there that can make you happy but there’s that perfect match waiting for you… you just have to be willing to take the risk…
Yes, agreed… we must be willing to take a risk on love… a risk to look like a fool and possibly fall flat on our faces 🙂 If we’re lucky… someone lovely will be there to pick us up!! I’m so happy you found your perfect match!! I know mine is out there too!! Thank you, R.G. 😉
Good luck! 🙂
THANK YOU!! I will take all the good luck I get offered 🙂 Tee hee!!! Luck, sent right back at’cha too!!
Thank you for that! I’ve gone through a lot of relationship troubles recently and I’ve always had the idea that if something ends then is wasn’t right and the love wasn’t true. I like thinking that it was real, because it did feel very real and special until it broke.
Yep, sometimes it all boils down to timing… not that there wasn’t chemistry… not that there weren’t sparks… not that there wasn’t love… not that he/she was a bad person… the love remains… even when things break and crumble!! Cherish the memories, send love and light to him or her, and be at peace that you had a lovely and sometimes life changing experience!! Thank you for reading Candy Coated Reality!! xo!! Sending you love and blessings 🙂